Feeling breezy?

I feel for Britney. I really do. She's done such a good job of keeping her private parts just that, private... until now. We ain't seen a little nip or nothing over her entire career. Then she gets a divorice and starts hanging with Paris, and we get new cooch shots 3 days in a row... But what's really the big deal??? Plenty of chics don't wear underwear!!

I've dated chicks that don't wear underpants on the reg, I've been to the club and have seen ladies dancing on the bar without underwear on too! Both in Chicago AND DC... So for all the Britney haters who are calling her a hoe for doing this or that somehow it's Paris' fault, it's just not true... I find it ironic that hanging with the queen of homemade porn somehow makes your body expose itself to the paparazzi, but still. I mean the second set of pics was just phenomenal, it was like dude froze space and time and just snapped away because I refuse to believe any normal woman wearing a short skirt without panties would leave her flower on view for as long as it would've taken my man to take the pictures that he did..

I was talking to my neighbor who said, "How come these famous white women don't wear drawls??!!!!" I don't think this is a white or black phenomenon either as I've dated all races of women who don't wear underwear (although it is more common with the white chicks). And seen all types of races up on top of the bar getting their groove on without underwear on.

And it's not a recent phenomenon either, this has been going on since at least my early bartending days of 1996. When chics would stand by the bar and let you know they didn't have any panties on...

me: "Really? No panties?? well it's still $5 for that Amaretto Sour sweetie."

her: "But I just told you I didn't have on panties!!??"

me: "Yes, but that doesn't mean you get your drink for free!!"

I'm such an ass hole. Not that I'm really an ass hole, but I refused to allow the sight of sexy women to sway me into free drinks. After a while you become immune to it and you can see women who know how to use their sex appeal to get what they want coming a mile away. It makes it even more fun because they are so used to getting what they want... that when they don't get it, they don't know how to act....

The only reason It's a big deal is because it's BRITNEY's cooch. Much in the same way the frenzy that occurred when the Vida cooch pics started circulating, after a while it died down when we all realized, oh, okay, her cooch is.... a cooch too...

The only cooch I think I'd slap my momma to take a peak at is Sade's, but other than that you can keep the celebrity cooch shots to yourself, so please stop filling my inbox with pics of Britney's cooch. i've seen it and it's a regular old cooch okay?

~C

Don't forget to check out my links..

I'm always adding new links to my del.icio.us site so you can always go here to find out what websites I've been checking out lately. There is always a link over there in the margin on the right.. ------------>

~C

http://del.icio.us/curtischronicles

a new wet spot...

See, I know what you're thinking... and you're nasty. Just because I always have sex on my mind doesn't mean that I'm going to write about it.. actually, I've been pretty good about not writing about sex for quite a while now. I suppose I've developed a new sense of respect for the people I've had sex with... well, most of them... but it probably has more to do with the type of relationships I've been having over the past couple of years which have been much more serious and/or require a bit of trust.

If I ran over here to my blog and wrote about parking lot sex in the front seat of her car every time it happened that wouldn't be very cool now would it? It might increase my readership, but what would it say about me and the respect (or lack thereof) of the relationship I may be in at the time.

There are usually subtle hints here and there, but I've become a lot less direct about it because quite honestly at some point, you feel that pu$$y is pu$$y and sure some women know how to work it better than others, but ultimately, I'm just happy I'm getting some on a regular basis ya know??!! I've actually found myself in a situation where I'm not laying the pipe often enough if you can believe that!? They say that as women get older their sexual drive increases and I can attest that there is some truth to that.

Oh, so back to my wet spot. Yeah, so I'm finally building out the pimpish master bedroom closet in my new house and as I'm framing the wall, I get to the ceiling and wouldn't you know it... fu*king ceiling is moist... which means I have a roof leak that has already penetrated the roof and soaked through the drywall to the point that I can feel it on the underside of the ceiling. So add "new roof" to the list of things that I didn't plan on doing this winter.... FUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK!!!!!

So I had to make a decision on whether or not to stop, tear down the ceiling and wait until I get my new roof on until I finish the MBR closet............... so I just ignored it... yeah, I just acted like I didn't even notice it and kept on going and figure one day I'll deal with it... I mean, I'll know it's always there and there is a problem that needs to get fixed... but what the hell was I going to do about it??? I've reached the point where I just want to get things done in the house, so I decided to just keep on moving and deal with the problem another day.

I wonder if this is a metaphor for how I live my life??? The act of passing by and ignoring the things I don't want to deal with until I absolutely HAVE to... hmmmm.... funny how a little wet spot can make you completely re-evaluate your life ya know?......

~c

.... and you thought this post was going to be about sex........ ;)

What happened to rock music?

Seriously... What in the fu*k happened to rock music?

I've been trying to find some good next shit to buy, but I don't like anything new??? Maybe it's me, but it all just sounds too "tiny" for me... Like, there's not enough ASS in it anymore.. You know what I'm saying? I'm tired of all this fluffy wuffy weak shit, i wanna take it back to the RAW. Rock is suffering from all these band trying to be on some 2000 Radiohead atmospheric bullshit...

I mean as atmospheric as the Smashing Pumpkins were, those MFers could ROCK OUT when they wanted to!!! The spacey shit was always a set up for the blow your ass off crescendo which led to the ... you know what I'm saying right?! I miss that and the complete rawness of the Nirvana era... Hell, at one point I was secretly buying anything that was made by a band from Seattle... but what happened?

Maybe in this age of bedroom musicians, I think we've lost the art of making albums, concept albums, of mixing, of mastering your music and maybe thats why it all sounds like shit.. These youngins don't know nothing about mastering your shit the way Herb Powers or ...what'shisname... um... Brian Eno used to do!!! (I can't lie, I had to look that shit up..)

I'm so done with R&B and Hip-Hop its not even funny. All my Soul heroes (D'Angelo, Maxwell, etc...) have disappeared, so I'm trying to get back into Rock, but its been hard... help a brotha out and recommend some good Rock music if you know any i should be checking for...

~C

Racial tirades

First it was Mel Gibson with his rant against the Jews, and now its Michael Richards from Seinfeld fame with his rant against blacks.

I could go into a little tirade about white people and racism that lingers under the surface... and how suppressing it for so long causes little outbursts like this, but that would be too easy right? In many ways, i think we'd all be a lot better off if racism was still more overt and out in the open. Then, there would be no question where people stand ya know?

I could walk into my office and see my boss and say, "Hey whitey, how ya doing? Actually, I don't care how you're doing, but hows my money doing? Did we pull in enough to pay me this week?"

and he could reply, "It's all good little niggaboy. I'm stacking those phat papers this week to make sure we've got plenty in the stash. But keep busting your ass because if shit gets tight, your black ass is gonna be the first to go, ya feel me?"

.. See, this way, there is no misconceptions and I won't have to go into a tirade about racism when I'm the first to get let go.

But to all of the black people that are mad at Michael Richards and are swearing off Seinfeld, how about this? Stop saying the word "nigga" in mixed company. Stop playing hip-hop songs around mixed company that has the word "nigga" in every other line. Until we stop using the word, we'll have to deal with the inevitable "nigga" vs "nigger" comments or even worse the "well you and all the hip-hoppers use it!!?" argument which puts me in the position of having to apologize for ignorant niggas.

So don't hate on Michael Richards, i was going to give him all kinds of props until that pitiful backtracking on Letterman the following day. After so eloquently expressing his true feelings at the moment, i wish he would've embraced it, the world would be such a better place. he should've rolled up on Letterman and said, "Hell yeah i called those MFers niggas!!! They were doing nigga shit!!! I make too much money to be heckled by those people!!! Now what beeyaatches!!!??? WU - TANG!!!!"

The funny thing is if a black person went into a tirade about white people, it probably wouldn't make the news... You know why??? Because white folks already know we don't like most of them! ha ha!! Nah, I'm playing... we like white people, otherwise we wouldn't have jobs and shit.

Well, Happy Thanksgivingto you all. I'm volunteering on Thanksgiving day and spending the rest of the long weekend building a walk-in closet. I have a lot to be thankful for this year and I hope you take the time to do something productive and/or give some money or something to someone / something who is less fortunate that your internet savvy computer having ass, k?

~C

the urge to purge

Do you ever get the feeling that you just need to start fresh from time to time but you're already so deeply involved into things that it is hard to understand or even fathom how to start over or at least move forward with a fresh perspective on things? I know I've had the feeling lately that I just need to get rid of some things so that i can focus on some other things, but I keep everything so its hard to understand or realize what it is that I should purge...

It is so easy to get comfortable and maintain the status quo with things in our lives sometimes that making the difficult decisions becomes something we just put off and never get around too... i can feel it, decision time is coming for a lot of things, and for a lot of people I know. I only hope we're all prepared to make the tough choices when the time comes.

~C

Negroes Don't Vote! - The Afterparty!!! 11/7!!!

Call me jaded. Call me nihilistic. Call me apathetic. And i know it is very wrong of me to make this assumption, so wrong and unfair, to assume the things i assume about my people from time to time, BUT I'd bet money that half of these folks that live across the street from me aren't going to vote today.

So I'm looking forward to the afterparty, everyone out on the front porch drinking malt liquor while the DirecTV tells the world about the Republican victory. There is going to be lots of good talk about how they "heard" about voting machine error, voter intimidation, butterfly punchcard ballots, diebold, and stolen elections... but did you get off your ass on vote?

I understand how voting in DC is kind of a waste of time, but there are some important positions like the school board president, ANC commissioners, etc... that are supposed to make a difference. With all the beuracracy that exists, you wonder if it really can though. But for all of these important senate races in MD, VA, MO, TN, black folks have got to get out to the polls!!!

I want you all to make someone feel guilty today, that's right, guilt folks into going to the polls. Hold their hand, walk them there, I don't care but get people out to vote.

Now I'm TOTALLY the pot calling the kettle black because I didn't vote. But not because I didn't want to, I'm having a mess of a time getting a DC drivers license / ID card so that I can transfer my car title, tags and insurance to my new address. It's been a freaking nightmare and in the process I missed the deadline to apply for registration. I know, I know. I'm pretty pissed about it so you don't have to rub it in. But hell, It's taken me 3 months to get a freaking SuperCan!! So I understand the apathy that exists after living here for many years in poverty that a freaking vote ain't going to change shit about your life... I get that, but breaking out the grill and cooking ribs in the front yard when it's 40 degrees while you and your neighbor trade spotter duties on his weight bench (also in the front yard), with the 6 year old running around in a T-shirt and snot running down his nose ain't really doing much to change shit either.

Did I tell you the one about my neighbor across the street that tried to rent me my own house?

I can't remember if i did or not, but she was sitting on her front porch not doing shit for a few hours while I was coming in and out of the house covered in dust from tearing up a wall or some shit, when she comes up to me and asks if she could come inside and see my house. I calmly told her no, to wait until I'm done and I'll be sure she gets an invite to the party. But she proceeds to tell me she's been wanting to rent one of these houses for a while, so I should rent it to her because she needs a 3 bedroom house for her and her 3 kids because this one bedroom apartment just isn't big enough...

I explain that I wouldn't have anywhere to live if I rented her my house. She then proceeded to give me a little bit of an attitude and said, "You mean to tell me you're gonna have all of this house all to yourself??!!! That's not fair!!! Why don't you rent me the house and I'll rent the basement out to you?...."

".................."

... I feel like I've told this story already no??? i'm too lazy to scan the chronicles to see if I typed it though..

I said, "So you're going to rent ME, the basement of MY house while you live in the top two floors.... does that sound like a deal I should accept to you?"

she said, ".... naw, i guess you're right. well when you're ready to rent to me, just let me know..."

I sure will... i sure will..

aaahhhhhh, finally...

whew!!! got my first check from the new job yesterday.. what a freaking relief!!

it's funny how things work out, but I was worried there for a second. Sure i had the new job and had started working, but I hadn't been paid in a minute and I had a mortgage to pay. My old job send my last check to my house via fedex, but you know how brothas in the hood are... they don't get too many fedex trucks around my way, so instead of leaving a note, or getting the REQUIRED SIGNATURE to deliver the package, the fed ex guy/girl decides they'll just leave the package at my front door.

Now, I have a nice brand spanking new front door, so I could see how one might get the impression that everything is copasetic and it would be ok to leave the package at my door. however, if one would turn around and take note of the family of 7 living in the one bedroom apartment who put their entire living room in the front yard when the sun is out, or perhaps the perpetual go-go concert that occurs due to the fact that my other neighbor puts his speakers in the window and plays music for the neighborhood, .... one might be inclined to not leave a fedex package lying at someone's front door for all to see. Maybe it's just me, but this fedex person is an idiot.

Needless to say, someone stole the fedex with my last check in it. So when I called up my old job to curse them out for not getting my check to me in a timely manner I found out it was delivered and left at my door. So we had to stop payment on the check, cut me a new one, blah blah blah..... curtis don't get paid for a while... then my new company had the audacity to make me work for a whole pay period before they paid me. (jokes...) not to mention I racked up a $450 cell phone bill with all of the calling and interviewing setup that occurred last month (which is prompting me to switch to Sprints flexible plan shit). there was a little period there when the bills were all coming in, the mortgage was due and i hadn't been paid. But it all looks like it's going to work itself out.

Also, a big fat congratulations to my main man Ron whose wife is pregnant. There is something in a man's voice who is about to have a baby that is difficult to describe... Well, I mean, when the baby is planned you know... There is this notion of self-assuredness and confidence which screams "HA MOTHERFU*KERS MY SOLDIERS MARCH GATDAMMIT!!!". you can't really pinpoint what it is, but there is something empowering in knowing for sure that you can breed. At least you hear it with the first child, I don't really have any friends with more than one child, but I'm imaging once the financial realities kick in, that same aura of pride isn't quite there for #2... probably more of a "fu*k me! again?!!" that comes through in the voice, but I'm just speculating...

~C