riding the train..

My good friend had his Audi S4 jacked from his driveway the other day. I know the feeling I had back in Chicago when you go to your car to find your window smashed and all your shit inside rumaged through. The feeling of violation is one that is difficult to describe... sitting in the driver's seat, knowing some stranger was sitting there a few hours prior going through all your shit.

but I can't imagine walking out and just realizing that my car is GONE!! I guess it kinda spares you the feeling of seeing your shit all fucked up and actually having to experience the violation. With the car just gone, you just have memories to rely on. I'm not saying you'd be any less mad, but it might be a little easier to swallow.... well, probably not, if i had an S4...

Well at least he has a sense of humor about the whole thing and his new lifestyle of riding the train in New York. This is a little story I received from him the other day:

~C

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So i was getting on the 'F' train destined for home after an extremely long day of work. I found a seat, and prepared for my long, boring 1 hr commute home. however, the very next stop my entertainment for the trip home boarded. it made the trip go by in a matter of minutes, as i just kept noticing things about this guy that cracked me up.

I want you to picture isaac hayes minus about 20 years. isaac is wearing a tan mesh cowboy hat. he's wearing silver duane wayne dark glasses without the flip up option, an off white linen shirt with white embroidery down either side of the buttons, and white linen pants. i couldn't see his shoes because a woman who was about 14 months pregant was sitting in between him and me with her belly blocking my view.

before i go on, you should know that there seems to be a bit of a commuter culture on the subway in NYC. the ritual once you get on, is you get settled, wait a few minutes apparently pondering the genre of music you are into, then pull out your mp3 and enjoy the tunes. the other option is that you can pull out whatever book you're into and get to reading. the final option is you let you're head hang and catch whatever uncomfortable z's you can grab.

however, isaac surprised me with his own little twist. he placed the headphones in his ear and then pulled out a CASSETTE PLAYER!!! not just any cassette player, he pulled out a COBY. if memory serves me correctly, i owned 2 or 3 coby's in the 1980's to tie me over in between losing good walkmen. you would get a good 2 weeks out of it before it's appetite for magnetic tape would begin and make meals out of your mc-lyte, troop, and erik b tape recordings.

I didn't know if i should get up and point and laugh, or marvel at this man's engineering skills at keeping this disposable magnetic device operational for so long. being that isaac didn't exactly look the part of master engineer, i figure he must've lost it shortly after buying it and found it 2-3 days ago while unpacking boxes or some shit, but that theory was quickly put to rest, because numbers for the fm tuner were worn off, and the decorative paint schemes were worn down. this recorder had been putting in time.

i remember buying my coby's for about 19.99 at cvs (1988 dollars). with inflation and depreciation, i estimate the worth of this device at $0.73. in fact, the 2 AA batteries to run it cost 5 times more than the damn device. He must've supercharged the amp in that thing or somethin, 'cause this cat was bobbin his head off, i thought he was gonna sprain something! you gotta admire this guy's "'i don\t give a fuck attitude" because the whole time he had is coby cassette player in his hand proudly displaying the brand name, he could have easily put it in his pocket, but hell no...... not isaac.

i was gonna ask him what he was listening to, but you never know what people are carrying under thier shirt on the nyc subway. i was sure this dude was listening to some shit at half speed or something, then it happened. i realized it was an original coby when this cat pushed eject and flipped the tape over...... no autoreverse!!! that's just like the coby's i've owned. if you wanted autoreverse you had to at least purchase a jvc. coby new it's place, they new their niche. no frills music playing until you get the shit you really want. then 5 minutes later, the coby showed its age. i did notice that isaacs love for the dubbed tape (memorex green label) waned once he flipped to the other side. but after those five minutes, isaac flipped the tape again!! the side wasn't done, this cat don't have no reverse!! sure enough, on the re-flip isaac's head starts bobbin like a transvestite prostitute at a rest stop!

at this point, i can't handle the comedy any longer, i glance down at his bag and actually laugh out loud. his bag reads, "Smart Choice: cutting edge technology, improving your business". it looked like one of those free promotional tote bags, but even so, i doubt smart choice lived up to thier name giving this cat the ability to promote thier product.

then at roosevelt avenue the show ends, but not before (as if he was reading my mind) he pauses at the double doors of the subway train

.......and does a spin in place, i kid you not.

with that last burst of fancy footwork i did finally notice his shoes, black fake alligator skin. i was hopiing for some pink felt or some shit. oh well, how much comedy can one man stand in one sitting anyway.

an absolutely true story. when i was watching it, i was like, yo, i gotta tell curt this shit. aight man, i'm out.